Missing Assignment

Today my father got an email update of my English grade. I'm missing one assignment and he starts yelling at me, saying I've been goofing off, sleeping too much, playing to many games and spending to much time with friends. I've only been to a friends house twice this month and I only play games about once every two weeks. I admit I sleep quite a bit, but I still get my homework done. As a matter of fact, I got a 3.6 GPA last quarter, which just ended about two weeks ago. But, no, according to him I'm a horrible student. When I told him it didn't matter and he tried to say it did I obviously asked for my overall grade. He wouldn't give it to me. This must mean it's good and if he gave it to me I'd win the argument. Then he brings up how I got a 47% the next day and won't accept that it's because I have no book and have no way to get to the library. I said that my mom never took me and asked if I should then have made one materialize out of thin air. When I said that he said he would've took me. Okay, but neither he or I have cards.

Of course I was yelling back at him this whole time, I mean, I was being attacked for such a petty thing. He then told me to stop back talking and basically said that he was right because he's my father. So being a father means you can be a *bad word*? According to my father it does.

My father mainly attacks me, too. Right after he stopped arguing with me he asked my brother if he did his homework. He got a little mad when my brother said he'd do it later, but he let it go and just said we're going to my grandmother's. Of course we are, my father's a mama's boy and needs to see her every day. My brother said he wasn't going because he had homework to do. My father then began to argue when was the last time we saw her. I said that she came over not to long ago, so my father comes into my room and yells at me again about going to see her. Then he brings the argument back to my missing assignment in English and the no book thing. He told me he would've gotten a card and taken me, and since I couldn't tell him I'd rather get a 47% than ride in a car with him, I just let it go and let him leave my room.

Now I'm close to tears of frustration from this whole thing. There's no getting through to him. He's always right and I'm always wrong. If he wants to argue then I get the short end of the stick. My brother's safe from this because he simply doesn't care if my father yells at him or not, but I'm not like that. I'll tell my father he's being unfair and he'll argue back that he can be since he's the father. That would only make sense if it actually helped me. I only do good in school because of my self-motivation to not end up like him, not because he yells at me if I don't. I could care less what he thinks; all I care about is that I don't become a lazy bum who dropped out a college.

This whole thing makes me remember back when I used to adore my father, but then I grew up and saw through all his lies. And that's not an exaggeration, my family actually lied to me when I was younger about what my father did to protect my innocence. I never knew why he was fired from TRW (which I can't say since it's inappropriate), that he never paid bills, that he's a bum, and so much more. Now that I do know, and now that I'm old enough to argue back to my dad I honestly can see he's my least favorite family member and that I could do without him. Most would say this isn't true, but I honestly hope for him to get a job as a truck driver and be home much less often and I try and avoid him at him by rarely leaving my room when he's in the living room. Not to mention all the times my mother and I rejoice because we get the house to ourselves. If only his income didn't matter, even though now he's on unemployment and waiting to get called back to his job, which won't ever happen. I saw the letter he got, saying he was laid of indefinitely. When I confronted him about it he said he wasn't fired and that he'd be called back. I guess sleeping all day and visiting his mom is much better than looking for a job. I mean, why should he when unemployment is obviously paying for what he needs?